Closed Doors and Wanting More
by Diary
Summary: "Of course not. Most so-called shamans in New York are just frauds, and I don't think any of the legitimate ones would take a fifteen-year-old girl seriously." Complete.


Disclaimer: I do not own Ugly Betty.

* * *

Stretching out on his bed, Justin kept a close eye on the bottom of his door, ready to immediately stop talking the moment he saw shadows and human feet.

"Don't call her until tomorrow," Austin said over the phone. "Her dad was not happy that a boy was calling her so late. And she threatened to find a shaman to curse me if I didn't explain what was going on. Other than that, though, she was real excited."

"You didn't tell her, did you?"

"Of course not. Most so-called shamans in New York are just frauds, and I don't think any of the legitimate ones would take a fifteen-year-old girl seriously."

"Why did I ever think you were normal? Or better yet, how?"

"See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Justin answered, softly, touching his lips and remembering the kisses from earlier.

…

The next day, Austin was waiting outside at class. "Ready," he asked, grinning.

Nodding, Justin took a deep breath, and they went inside.

Sitting on opposite sides of Lily, Justin grabbed the book she was reading while Austin lifted up her book bag and moved it out of her reach. "Hey," she said, blinking, looking at Justin.

"Lily, we need to talk," Austin said, causing her to squeal, spinning around to hug him, almost sitting in his lap.

"You're really back! Why did you quit, and..." She continued on, hugging him tightly.

Setting the book down so that her page wouldn't be lost, Justin helped Austin get her seated. She kept one hand wrapped around Austin's, however.

"Um, we have a secret," Justin said. "And we need you to promise that you won't tell anyone."

"Or punch us," Austin added, earning him a look from both of them.

"Okay," Lily said, letting go of Austin's hand and arranging herself so that she could look at both of them. "What's going on?"

"The night of the play, I kissed Justin," Austin explained, quietly.

"That's nice," she said, dismissively. "Now, why did-" She paused, and they saw the slow realisation cross her face. "Oh," she said, before breaking into a smile. "It's about time. Congratulations, you two."

At their looks, she rolled her eyes. "Ever since you joined, I've been afraid to wear pigtails," she informed Austin. "You two are like Beatrice and Benedick."

"Justin isn't ready for his family to know."

Nodding, Lily took both of their hands and squeezed. "I understand."

"So, you're really okay with this?"

"Bisexual sister," she reminded them, "and her girlfriend is one of the best things that ever happened to her. I'm just glad you two finally figured it out."

Letting go, she reached for her book and said to Austin, "Switch places with me, okay?"

Once they did, she pulled out her camera from her bag. "I want a picture of you two."

They both protested, but she simply stared until they agreed, Austin slinging an arm around Justin's shoulders. "Smile," she instructed.

…

"I thought there was a no door-closed with boys rule."

"There was," Justin said, grinning, as he moved over to Austin. "But I convinced them to lift that rule by bringing up the idea that I might have boys from class over, and it's just easier to close the door to practise without dealing with all the awkwardness of having to get permission."

"Should I be insulted that they don't know I'm the only boy from class who's ever been over?"

Laughing, Justin leaned over and kissed him.

…

Unfortunately, awesome makeout sessions aside, there was guilt, as well as the fact that the only time people weren't intruding were when he and Austin watched movies in the living room or played video games.

Then, there was the curiosity now that Austin was always hanging around the house. His mother was always asking him questions, and Bobby kept trying to hang out with him during the most inconvenient of times. He loved Bobby, he was determined to make sure the wedding happened, but he wished Bobby would give him space to spend with Austin.

Everything finally came to a head after he was roped into a bachelor party instead of getting to go on a real date.

"I promise, we'll go to the concert," he said as they stood near the front door.

"It's okay," Austin answered. "Really. It's cool that you're getting such a cool stepdad. He loves you."

"Yeah, it is," Justin agrees. "But we're going. I'm getting a date out of you before you end up getting yourself killed chasing after a pixie or trying to flag down a UFO."

That caused a grin, and Austin reached over, squeezing his wrist. "So, you admit that-"

"No, I still think you're insane. Unless there's a creature that steals the ability to make decent fashion choices out of people-"

"Is that why you always try to take my shirt off," Austin inquired, grinning cockily.

Trying to keep the rising heat in his face down, Justin leaned over to kiss him.

Then, he felt eyes on him. Seeing Bobby staring through the window at him, he quickly backed away. "I'm sorry, but you need to go, now," Justin whispered, wondering if Austin was going to get tired of all this.

"Okay," Austin said, quietly, looking confused and a little hurt. "Call me later."

…

Inside, he found himself blurting out, "Just, please, don't tell anyone."

…

"Um, so, is Austin your boyfriend?"

Justin felt that was a really good question. They'd kissed and were hopefully going on a date, but did that make them boyfriends? "I don't know," he answered. "Maybe." Now that the question was posed, he hoped the answer was yes.

They talked, and Marc said, "Bobby's a really great guy; he's not going to say anything."

He vaguely remembered Marc's mother, the lady with the sweet cat, who had seemed to want to be anywhere else but their house. After Marc had left, he'd heard his family talking about how bad they felt for Marc. "She's no mother, I'll tell you that," his granddad had said, disapprovingly.

Everyone in the family knew Marc was gay, and they all seemed to accept him. But Justin's grandfather was Catholic, his mother had mentioned grandchildren a few times, and his aunt could be surprisingly judgemental about things.

He remembered the high school prank, being crowned Homecoming Queen, and announcing he wasn't gay. He hadn't stuck around long enough to see if they were relieved or sceptical.

Most of all, Justin knew that sometimes the idea of something was completely different from the reality, and he just couldn't be sure that they'd be okay with him really being gay and having a boyfriend.

"Okay," Marc said, "okay, breathe. You don't have to say a word until you're ready."

…

"Thanks," he said to Marc when they were through talking, feeling much calmer.

"This is the beginning, you know," Marc tells him, ruffling his hair. "This thing with Austin, it may or may not last, but you've taken your first steps into one day finding happiness."

Nodding, he went to Aunt Betty's, wondering when he'd take the next step.

…

After his talk with Marc, things were a little less stressful. Bobby kept his promise, and his mother stopped asking so many questions about Austin. Although, she was insistent he invite Austin to the wedding.

"He's your best friend, honey. Don't you want him there with you?"

"I'm just not sure he'll want to come."

"There will be free food and music," she insisted, handing him her veil for inspection. "What teenage boy would turn that down?"

"I'll see if he's free," he promised, handing the veil back. "Maybe trim it about three inches," he suggested.

…

Later, Justin invited him, and then, saw two black bracelets being sold at a street vendor. "We're getting these," he said. "They're so much better than the others."

Nodding, a grin forming, Austin dug out his wallet while Justin got his. "So, you're sure you're cool with me coming?"

"Yeah," Justin answered, softly. "I'm sorry about all of this. I mean, your dad knows, and it must be hard dealing with someone who-"

"Justin, it's fine," Austin interrupted, holding his arm out so that Justin could help but the bracelet on. "It took me a long time for me to tell him, and even then, it was something that just came out. I didn't plan on doing it. And I didn't even have a boyfriend. I know how hard it is for you to find the right time to say, 'By the way, you were right, and oh, this is my boyfriend.'"

"So, we are boyfriends?"

"Are we? I mean, it kinda seems like we are, but I'm- I've never had one before, so-"

Laughing, Justin grabbed Austin's hand, linking it with his. "Boyfriends," he declared.

"Boyfriends," Austin agreed, the smile fully forming.

…

At the wedding, he was too busy focusing on watching his mother, beautiful and glowing with happiness, to worry about anything.

As she danced, he realised, I want that. I want Austin over for tamale night. I want to hold his hand when we watch TV. When we have a fight, I want to talk to Mom and let Granddad fix me calorie-laden, sugar-filled deserts.

He didn't want to lose his right to close the bedroom door when Austin was over, but the rule meant that his family understand and accepted the seriousness of the relationship, of what might eventually happen.

Looking around, he saw people dancing, couples holding hands and softly kissing, and he wanted to do that, too.

Making his decision, he stood, holding his hand out.

A questioning look in his eyes, Austin took it, and Justin felt his resolution cement when he saw they were holding the hand of the arms containing the bracelets. He smiled and nodded, and if his resolution had any weakness, they disappeared when Austin's beautiful smile appeared.

They danced, and Justin felt eyes on him, but he was too happy to care.

…

That night, his grandfather kissed him on the forehead, sitting down. "Austin is coming over tomorrow night?"

"Mom really didn't leave him much of a choice," Justin noted. Sighing, he asked, "Grandpa, are you really okay with this?"

Taking his hand, his granddad answered, "The world I grew up in didn't believe in anything but men and women. A lot of the world now is still like that. Because of that, I don't exactly understand it; I've never really been taught to try to. But when I look at Austin, I see a nice boy. And when I look at him with you, I see my grandchild happy. That's what's important. Life's never been easy for you, Justin, and because of this, it might never be."

Smiling, he continued, "When your mother told your grandmami and me she was having a baby, I prayed for you and her. I prayed you'd be healthy, that you'd understand how much love we all had for you, that you'd be happy and have a better life than Rosa and I did, a better life than I was able to give your mother and aunt. When I first realised you might be different, I prayed for the world to love and accept you as we do."

Leaning over, he kisses him, again. "You're a good person, and you're happy. Those two things are all I've ever wanted for you."

"Thanks, Grandpa," Justin said, reflecting that Marc was right. He really was taking the first important steps towards happiness.


End file.
